Rules of the basement:

Over the course of a few weeks, I, Ray Berentes, have noticed that the basement has grown progressively worse and utterly disgusting. I’ve also noticed that I’m the only individual who cleans up after themselves no matter the circumstances. This space’s (the basement) intention is to please all of us accordingly, not the select few that only inhabit it when it’s clean and meets their satisfactory idea of an ideal living quarters. Continuing, I’ve drafted up a set of particular rules. These rules are not to be circumvented or manipulated in such a fashion that will inevitably prove to be undoubtedly deviant, or conniving. These rules are applicable to every member of the household, without contest. If someone has a guest, it is your responsibility to see to it that all the rules hereby stated are abided by. Anyone who unintentionally/intentionally violates any rule (none in specific) will be sought out and bitched at for not complying. You’ll also be restricted from using things like the Xbox, the computer, the TV. I provide numerous resources for this basement’s non-expendable entertainment; do not take advantage of that.

Rule 1: Any dishes, containers, glasses, cups, wrappers, identifiable pieces of trash must be discarded of or brought upstairs to be washed routinely, daily. Nothing is to be left over night to ferment.

Rule 2: This rule pertains to maintenance and general room presentation. Half the time this basement looks like a piece of shit. I’m exhausted from seeing that random objects are left scattered all throughout the room. When you’re done with something, put it back. I do not want to see controllers laying on the ground or papers decorated with cat piss littered all over the desk.

Rule 3: The portable heater located under the East ground-level window is usually always left on for whatever reason. When you’re not occupying the basement, the heater is to be turned off. Do not go asking Dad for 10, 20 dollars when you could have saved him that much just by turning the damn heater off.

Rule 4: The computer plays an essential role in everyone’s life. I personally spend hours on end every month making sure this computer is running properly. If you’re going to download something, please wait for me to approve of it. I don’t need a repeat of last time, because if that does happen and I find out that someone downloaded something without me knowing it, which is not likely, he/she will be forever banned from using the computer in the basement.